Today’s F*** Yeah Video: Bully Gets DROPPED

14 03 2011

Reason #1 to never be the much smaller guy in the bully-bullied relationship.

Once the dude has had enough of your puny ass, this is what happens.

DROPPED.

That tiny ass bully has to be a few years away from gaining his equilibrium back.

Here’s to you, Casey… or as his Internet nickname is slowly becoming…

Casey the Punisher

Good for you.

Damn that made my day.





Rebecca Black Lets Me Know That Yes, I Do Still Have a Chance of Having a Music Career

13 03 2011

And I thought I couldn’t stand Justin Bieber’s music.

Holy shit this takes the cake as one of the worst songs I’ve heard in a long while.

And, yes, even Kim Kardashian’s lifeless lyrics in her recent song “Jam” are WAY better by comparison… that’s saying something.

The song is called “Friday” by Rebecca Black… whoever the hell she is.

Her rhyme scheme is more of a shitstorm than a rhyme scheme really.

“I got this, you got this, my friend is to my right.”

“We we we we we so excited.”

“Yesterday was Thursday. Today it is Friday. Tomorrow is Saturday. And Sunday comes afterwards.”

No shit, Sherlock. And somehow this has over 800,000 views.

And Usher on the track. What?

People, if you ever thought that you couldn’t make it in a certain profession because you just weren’t talented enough… trust me, you can suck majorly like this girl and still do SOMETHING relevant.

Although in her case, you’re really gonna have to put a definition on the word “relevant.”

I have no appreciation for the word and day Friday any longer.

And honestly, the comically slowed down version sounds better.

Good lord.

Any record labels looking to sign a white rapper with below average lyrics and delivery?

If so, I’m the guy you’re looking for.

FUN FUN FUN





Summerish Weather = Windows Down & Cruisin’ Music

3 03 2011

The weather has been so damn nice in Arizona recently (and should only be getting better)… that it’s starting to feel a bit summerish.

Yeah, the lukewarm days and the just-right temperature nights.

It’s getting to be the perfect time of year here in Arizona.

And in my opinion, there’s no better feeling than cruising with the windows down in your car with weather like this.

Personally speaking, I’m a big fan of old school hip hop.

Ice Cube, Dre, Too $hort, Biggie, 2Pac… no particular order but you catch my drift.

A particular genre that I’ve taken a liking to is G-Funk, a style of West Coast gangsta rap over smoother, calmer instrumentals that gained quality airplay in the early and mid 90s.

And to me, if you combine rolling in your car with the windows down and summer-esque weather, you better be bangin’ some good throwback instrumentals.

Here are five of my favorite G-Funk cruisin’ tunes for you to bump:

Too $hort – Just Another Day (1993)

Ice Cube – You Know How We Do It (1994)

Dr. Dre – Keep Their Heads Ringin’ (1995)

Ice Cube – Check Yo Self (1993)

Geto Boys – Damn It Feels Good to Be a Gangsta (1992)

From the movie Friday to the movie Office Space, you may have heard these before, but one thing I can assure you is that these are just a bunch of 15+ year old hits that will making cruising in your car even better.





Winning! Charlie Sheen is the Dude Everyone Wants to Party With

1 03 2011

When Charlie Sheen was asked if he likes to party, his response was,

“What’s not to love?”

When Charlie Sheen was asked if he is bi-polar, his response was,

I’m bi-winning.”

And that’s why Charlie Sheen is currently “the man.”

As Mugatu would say, Charlie Sheen is so hot right now.

So hot that he joined Twitter today (with his bio saying: unemployed winner), and he already has surpassed 375,000 followers (update at 11:30 pm Pacific: 589,000+ followers).

The guy who once played Rick “Wild Thing” Vaughn in the movie Major League has turned into a wild thing of his own recently.

Recently, Charlie Sheen has:

  1. Had restraining orders against him,
  2. Been arrested for domestic violence,
  3. Had briefcases of cocaine delivered,
  4. And completely busted up a hotel room, passed out naked and had a stripper/porn star locked in his hotel closet.

You know. The usual.

Sure you may get caught up in all the hooker and booger sugar talk, but what’s really been captivating lately have been his interviews.

His interviews with Dan Patrick, Piers Morgan and ABC have had everyone laughing, amazed, confused and astonished all in one.

And his frequent use of the word “winning” is quickly turning into the next catchphrase.

I couldn’t care less about Two and a Half Men having their last four episodes canceled.

Whether or not Charlie’s completely clean… I don’t care… all I know is that he’s just funny as hell right now.

And honestly, if you can only party one more time in your life, and you can go to a wild party hosted by anyone in the world… who wouldn’t pick Charlie Sheen?

Then again, I might pick Brian Wilson of the San Francisco Giants, considering he already kicked it with Mr. Winning already. But then again, Wilson and Sheen are pretty much the same person.

Two things are guaranteed on a night out with Charlie Sheen: police that night and TMZ on your doorstep the next morning.

But it would be totally worth it.





Oh Damn It: Nickelodeon Bringing Back the Classics is a Big Hoax

1 03 2011

Just today, Nickelodeon supposedly announced that because of their drastic ratings drop since they decided to move away from being cartoon-based, they will return some of their classic cartoons that we grew up on.

I’m talking Rugrats, Doug, Rocket Power and Hey Arnold!

Starting again on March 14th apparently!

EFF YES. This just made my freakin’ week.

Oh wait… hold on now.

This is one of the crappiest looking press releases I’ve ever seen.

Damn it, what a letdown.

I remember my friends and I had talked about this for years; about how Nick desperately needed to launch a 90s cartoon network because of the still-strong cartoon following.

Being the big SpongeBob fan that I remain to be, still airing that show alone on Nickelodeon is nice, but Nick’s lineup would’ve been beefed up on the ‘roids in a major way.

I would have been interested to see whether the cartoons would’ve pick up where they left off age-wise, or if the characters would be older now.

Regardless, Nick needs to scrap some of the BS shows they have on Nick. Random shows like Phineas & Ferb and Team Umizoomi… what the hell is that? Sounds like pure horsecrap.

The Nick higher-ups made big mistake after big mistake in ending their cartoons.

Other shows like Rocko’s Modern Life, Ren & Stimpy, Aaahh!!! Real Monsters, The Angry Beavers, CatDog or even The Wild Thornberrys were all big for our generation.

Either way, I think I speak for a lot of 90s kids when I say this hoax is just cruel.

I couldn’t wait to set my DVR.

I feel like Nicolas Cage in Deadfall right now.





Inside SoCal: Dude, F***ing Gnarkill

28 02 2011

SoCal: it’s the f***ing dankest place on earth, dude.

Fer sure.

In case you didn’t know, SoCal has nothing but sick lifted trucks, bomb ass girls, yoked out bros, dank Mexican food, and a lot of chill kickbacks.

Vocabulary in SoCal is also limited to: dank, chill, sick, bro, tight, dude, weed, stoked, bomb, fer sure, and legit.

Sure that may be a little too stereotypical of the area I grew up in, but honestly… at times it’s not too far off.

Peep Inside SoCal… where they have a full report of all the legit stuff that’s going down in BroCal.

From a chill kickback to a sick motocross segment to how nice the weather is, Inside SoCal lets both SoCal natives and outsiders know how tight it is to be in SoCal.

It’s crazy but these guys almost make SoCal look as tight Teague Egan‘s sick LA crib.

For those keeping score, there are now 11 likes to 214 dislikes on Teague Egan’s sleazy Campus Cribs video. Glorious.

A big thanks to my bro P-Mull shooting me the link, this video is pretty crucial.

And that bombass burrito did look pretty bomb.

For more of KassemG’s videos, just check his YouTube account: KassemG.





Batting Stance Guy

27 02 2011

Every baseball player has a unique routine when they get into the batter’s box.

Between leg placement, hand placement, bend in the knees and swings in general… you’re hard pressed to find two identical stances and swings.

There have been more than a century’s worth of ballplayers with their own unique quirks… and this guy knows just about every one of them.

Meet Gar Ryness.

Or as most know him: The Batting Stance Guy.

For a baseball fan, this is just awesome.

He does Manny Ramirez, Big Papi, Cal Ripken Jr., Kevin Youkilis, Derek Jeter, Rod Carew, Willie Stargell… he does a fair amount on this Letterman appearance.

And they’re all spot on even with his funny and drastic over-exaggerations.

With me being an Angels fan, I found the one he did for the past and present Angels to be pretty hilarious.

He even goes on the field in front of players and does their swings. This guy’s the man.

He had Ryan Howard going.

He made Mark Teixeira crack up (still don’t like you).

He even got crazy ol’ Manny Ramirez rolling.

And one of my favorite swings has to be Vladimir Guerrero and even he couldn’t help but laugh.

Gar Ryness, ladies and gentlemen.








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